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Review: May/December

This fictionalised version of the Mary Kay Letourneau case has Natalie Portman playing an actress about to embark on a film project concerning the relationship between Grace (Julianne Moore) and Joe (Charles Melton, staggeringly out of his depth). What’s the fuss all about? Well, when Grace was 36 she began having criminal sexual contact with the then 13 year-old Joe and eventually became pregnant. Now Grace is around 60 and Joe in his 30s, and they’re welcoming Elizabeth (Portman) into their home and lives. The intrusion opens up holes in the relationship, whilst also taking Elizabeth on a bit of a journey herself.   The Mary Kay Letourneau criminal case could provide the basis for a good big screen film. Director Todd Haynes (the solid “Carol” ), screenwriter Samy Burch (better known as a casting director), and producer-star Natalie Portman have not given us that good film. This 2023 meta-infused fictionalisation of the real-life criminal case is utterly repugnant, worthless,...
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Review: Puppet Master III: Toulon’s Revenge

In 1940s Germany, a scientist (Ian Abercrombie) is forced by Gestapo Major Krauss (Richard Lynch) to work for the Reich in using chemicals to reanimate corpses. Meanwhile, puppeteer Andre Toulon (Guy Rolfe) does two things to piss off the Nazis; 1) Mock the F ü hrer through his puppet show, and 2) He refuses to give them the secret formula for giving the otherwise inanimate puppets life. Major Krauss responds to this lack of co-operation by having Toulon’s beloved wife (Sarah Douglas) gunned down as she attempts to stop them taking the formula. Time to unleash the puppet master’s obedient followers on the Third Reich!   If the first “Puppetmaster” film was the one that got Full Moon studios up and running, this 1991 prequel from David DeCoteau ( “Creepozoids” ) represents the high point of the series and one of the best films Full Moon ever made. Scripted by C. Courtney Joyner ( “Doctor Mordrid” , “Mandroid” ), the film is every bit as slow as the previous two films but the ke...
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Review: Man Hunt

Ethan Wayne plays The Stranger, who gets on the wrong side of a local rancher (Ernest Borgnine) and wrongly accused of stealing his horses. Sent to a harsh prison run by Henry Silva, who tries to break the young man. Wayne is hell-bent on escaping and clearing his name (Does ‘The Stranger’ even count as a name though?). Bo Svenson plays a lawman, with Terry Lynch playing Borgnine’s daughter who sympathises with Wayne.   So far as the sons of John Wayne go, Patrick Wayne is probably the most recognisable having appeared alongside his dad in films like “The Searchers” before trying to branch out on his own in the likes of “The People That Time Forgot” and playing Pat Garrett in the first “Young Guns” movie. Then there’s Ethan Wayne, you might’ve seen him on TV’s “Pawn Stars” as an ‘expert’ on his dad’s memorabilia. Yeah OK, he also played Storm Logan on “The Bold and the Beautiful” , and an early role with his dad in the underrated “Big Jake” , but that “Pawn Stars” gig is o...
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Review: Four-Sided Triangle

Childhood friends Stephen Murray, John Van Eyssen, and Barbara Payton are working on a scientific project – a duplication device. Murray has long harboured feelings for Payton, but the latter becomes engaged to Van Eyssen. What is a scientist with a duplication device and a love triangle to do? James Hayter plays the resident doctor in the small town the characters live in.   You won’t find too many films that director Terence Fisher ( “Stolen Face” , “The Curse of Frankenstein” , “Horror of Dracula” ) also worked on the screenplay for. In fact, there’s only two, the mediocre 1953 “Mantrap” and this 1953 sci-fi/drama, both for Hammer Studios. To be honest, it’s pretty clear that Fisher’s strengths aren’t in screenwriting, but this is by far the better of the two films. James Hayter and his narration are terrific, the film has a cosy, small village family movie vibe, at least at first. Imagine “The Fly” done by Frank Capra but set in England, and you’ll have some idea. There’s...
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Review: Aftersun

**** SPOILERS AHEAD, SAVE THE REVIEW FOR LATER. **** My take on this 2022 drama from Charlotte Wells is so greatly antithetical from 99.5% of the viewership of this film that, when combined with the seriousness of the subject matter, made me contemplate not even writing this review let alone publishing it. It just seemed to be asking for trouble that I genuinely don’t want. I certainly wouldn’t want to seem like I was trampling on or invalidating the greatly emotional response many had to the film. Your take on the film is no doubt absolutely valid and widely held. Y’know what, though? I think I owe it to the 0.5% to post this one and hope that maybe my view’s as valid as the majority view because I really do have a firm view on this one. It seems like cowardice to refrain from posting. Perhaps it’s a view a few of you will share, or at least one that you’ll understand.   This will be an entirely spoiler-filled review, because it’s impossible for me to talk about this particu...
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Review: Mitchell

Joe Don Baker plays the sleepy-eyed but dogged cop of the title who thinks there’s a criminal connection between sleazy lawyer John Saxon and crooked businessman (AKA drug kingpin) Martin Balsam. Harold J. Stone plays a criminal higher up on the chain than Saxon and Balsam. Robert Phillips plays the superior officer, Jerry Hardin is a desk sergeant, and Linda Evans plays a hooker/love interest for our leading man.   As shabby as its lead character and performance, this 1975 husky cop movie from director Andrew V. McLaglen (who later made the underrated actioner “The Wild Geese” ) and screenwriter Ian Kennedy Martin (creator of TV’s “The Sweeney” ) is an uneven experience. Lead actor Joe Don Baker’s performance is far from his best work. In fact, it’s proof that he’s a much better support player than lead. However, the bleary-eyed, yet determined cop character he plays here is not without some interest. His often lack of giveashit is amusing at times. Baker’s Mitchell actually ...
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Review: The Changeling

After witnessing the shocking deaths of his wife and child, composer George C. Scott moves from New York to Seattle to accept a teaching position. He rents an old house and it’s not long before strange and unsettling things appear to be occurring. He investigates with the help of the woman who found him the house in the first place (Trish Van Devere). Ruth Springford plays Van Devere’s co-worker, Jean Marsh briefly plays Scott’s ill-fated wife, and Melvyn Douglas plays an elderly senator who is somehow connected to everything, going all the way back to the early 1900s.   Well-paced, emotional, occasionally terrifying 1980 film from director Peter Medak ( “The Ruling Class” , “The Krays” ) is one of the best ghost/haunting films you’ll ever see. If you’ve seen the “Insidious” films, this was clearly one of the inspirations. George C. Scott, normally a tower of strength and full of power and bluster, is heartbreaking and sympathetic here. You’re so engaged in his personal loss a...
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Review: The Undead

Val Dufour plays a researcher for the American Institute of Psychical Research. He picks up a prostitute (Pamela Duncan) to take to psychiatrist/professor Maurice Manson for a unique psychological experiment. He wants to prove a point to Manson by putting Duncan under hypnosis for a 48 hour period so that she can travel back in time to a past life. That time appears to be vaguely Medieval, where Duncan is now an accused witch. Richard Garland plays her Medieval love interest, whilst Allison Hayes and Billy Barty play a witch and an imp respectively, who want to sell Garland’s soul to The Devil (Richard Devon). Dick Miller plays a leper, Mel Welles a verbose gravedigger.   Mixing Medieval trappings with an eerie Bridey Murphy-esque psychological story involving hypnotism and past lives, this curious 1957 Roger Corman ( “A Bucket of Blood” , “The Intruder” , “Tomb of Ligeia” ) film sure is one of his more ambitious films. That ambition won out for me over some of the lumps and bu...
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