Shameless Self Expression

Note: T he non-canon films “Casino Royale” (1967) and “Never Say Never Again” are included because, especially the latter, I consider them legit entries. Also, I’ve listed both title and end credits songs, at least as many as I’m currently aware of. As usual, feel free to flood my inbox telling me I have absolutely no idea what I’m talking about. On with the show... Bond Films Best to Worst 1. Dr. No 2. On Her Majesty’s Secret Service 3. You Only Live Twice 4. Tomorrow Never Dies 5. Live and Let Die 6. Octopussy 7. From Russia With Love 8. Goldfinger 9. Licence to Kill 10. SPECTRE 11. Die Another Day 12. The World is Not Enough 13. GoldenEye 14. The Spy Who Loved Me 15. Skyfall 16. The Man With the Golden Gun 17. For Your Eyes Only 18. Thunderball 19. Quantum of Solace 20. The Living Daylights 21. Never Say Never Again 22. Diamonds Are Forever 23. Casino Royale (1967) 24. Casino Ro

War veteran Paul Massie starts stirring up trouble for now privileged Dirk Bogarde by suggesting that he is an impostor (a slimy actor by the name of Frank Welney who was in the same POW camp as the other two men), and has clearly murdered the real Sir Mark Loddon. Wife Olivia De Havilland at first scoffs at such a ridiculous suggestion, but then again, there are whole sections of his own life that Loddon conveniently cannot remember (a side-effect of the war experience, apparently). The matter is taken to court, with Wilfrid Hyde-White the prodding prosecutor and Robert Morley the polite Defense attorney. Richard Wattis, sans spectacles, plays the judge, whilst veteran character actor Anthony M. Dawson is terrific as a distant and extraordinarily opportunistic relative of Sir Mark’s. Dated, disappointing 1959 Anthony Asquith ( “The Winslow Boy” , “The V.I.P.s” ) film is like a mostly British, 50s version of “The Return of Martin Guerre” and like that famous case, it just seem

Natalie Portman stars as a ballerina in the NY Ballet Company, and has landed the lead in “Swan Lake”. However, whilst director Vincent Cassel finds her perfect for the Swan Queen, she’s far too controlled and ‘too perfect’ for the darker flip-side, the Black Swan. Portman, who lives in claustrophobic hell with her clingy mother Barbara Hershey, starts to find the task of enacting the two differing personalities an enormous strain, both physically and psychologically. This becomes even more amplified when Mila Kunis turns up as Portman’s alternate, an outgoing, adventurous sort, who is everything Portman is not. She tries to get Portman out of her shell and away from her mother, and they even end up in bed together. However, is Kunis really all she appears? Is she plotting against Portman so she can take her role? Winona Ryder turns up as the bitchy, aging, and recently sacked premiere ballerina. Despite all the Oscar nominations and wins, and a somewhat arty subject matter, if

Matt Damon stars as a man with apparent psychic abilities (and a fondness for Charles Dickens). His brother (a surprisingly low-key Jay Mohr) wants him to use his abilities to make money, but Damon has tired of it. It especially makes life difficult for Damon when he wants to have a ‘normal’ relationship, such as with his cooking class partner Bryce Dallas Howard, who quickly disappears once Damon’s psychic readings hone in on childhood abuse at the hands of her father. Meanwhile, French TV presenter Cecile De France undergoes a dramatic change when she has first-hand experience with a tsunami. She goes under the water, starts to see some vague images of shadowy figures and a bright light as she comes dangerously close to death. Or perhaps momentarily ‘crosses over’, before being resuscitated. She subsequently struggles to come to grips with just what it is she experienced, and it starts to affect her work and her relationship with Thierry Neuvic. Frankie and George McLaren play Britis