Review: Taxi


Hopeless cop who can’t drive (Jimmy Fallon) hooks up with a sassy cab driver with a suped-up ride (Queen Latifah) to bust a gang of Brazilian bank-robbing supermodels. No, Really! Jennifer Esposito is the resident angry boss, who in a twist never really bothered with, used to date Fallon. Ann-Margret is scarily convincing as Fallon’s spacey, martini-loving mother.



Too good-natured and low-aiming to really get mad at, this 2004 Tim Story (“Barbershop”) remake of a Luc Besson film might’ve been better if the Fallon-Latifah stuff was actually a subplot, and the supermodel bank robber stuff moved more to the fore...and if they added a little something called humour. A laughing gas scene and Ann-Margret acting drunk (I think she’s acting) reeks of desperation, and so do gags about suped-up cars and bad driving. Oscar nominee Latifah (whose dialogue is at least 50% comprised of the exclamation ‘Damn!’, it seems) and Esposito (looking unhappy) are especially wasted, though the latter does get seductively frisked by Brazilian supermodel Giselle (whose performance isn’t anywhere near as bad as people say), which might float your boat momentarily.



It’s not like this was aiming for great comedy heights, and it certainly doesn’t come close to achieving them, or anything else really. It helps if you can tolerate Fallon (though I find him most funny when he’s unintentionally laughing during an “SNL” sketch). He’s affable, the film forgettable. Scripted by Jim Kouf (“Stakeout”, “Another Stakeout”, and the fun teen comedy “Up the Creek”), Ben Garant and comedy actor Thomas Lennon, who might’ve tried harder. It’s not terrible, though. There you go, that’s praise…sort of...not really.



Rating: C

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Review: Hellraiser (2022)

Recovering junkie Odessa A’zion accompanies scuzzy boyfriend Drew Starkey on a break-in where all they find is a weird puzzle box. A’zion later opens the box and after some weird shit happens, A’zion and Starkey figure it might be a good idea to learn more about this messed up trinket. Goran Visnjic plays a millionaire who possessed the box before our protagonist nicked it.   Is there any point in remaking/rebooting “Hellraiser” when the 1987 adaptation of Clive Barker’s original text was written and directed by Barker himself? And is considered a horror classic? On evidence here, absolutely not. Directed by David Bruckner ( “The Signal” ) and scripted by Ben Collins ( “The Night House” ) and Luke Piotrowski (ditto) this is an entirely tedious affair. I took a long time to get on board with the 1987 “Hellraiser” , I have to admit. It was wildly imaginative and original, like a nightmare transplanted on to film. However, the characters were stone cold and left me similarly chilly t
Read more

Review: Cinderella (1950)

The story of poor young Cinderella (voiced by Ilene Woods), treated as a servant by her nasty stepmother (voiced by Eleanor Audley), and dismissed by her thoroughly rotten, ugly stepsisters. Her only friends are a group of mice, who are forever being menaced by a cat named Lucifer (or as I call him, Grumpy Cheshire Cat). The King (hoping to find a wife for his charming son) is throwing a ball and every available young woman is invited to attend, and Cinderella is most excited to go. However, her stepmother and stepsisters do all they can to prevent this from happening. But with help from the mice and one fairy godmother (voiced by Verna Felton) later, and Cinderella looks set to attend the ball. You know the rest, folks.   Lovely 1950 Disney animated movie from directors Clyde Geronimi ( “Peter Pan” , “Lady and the Tramp” ), Wilfred Jackson ( “Fantasia” , “Alice in Wonderland” , “Peter Pan” ) & Hamilton Luske ( “Pinocchio” , “Fantasia” , “Peter Pan” ), that is a bit too s
Read more

Review: Eugenie de Sade

Eugenie (Soledad Miranda) makes a deathbed confession to author/biographer (Jesus ‘Jess’ Franco himself), recounting the tale of how her depraved stepfather (Paul Muller) groomed her into a life of depravity, debauchery, and murder.   Not to be confused with the similarly titled “Eugenie…The Story of Her Journey into Perversion” (by the same director) or “Justine de Sade” (which is not to be confused with Franco’s own “Justine” for that matter), this 1973 Marquis de Sade adaptation from writer-director Jesus Franco ( “99 Women” , “A Virgin Among the Living Dead” ) is perhaps the perfect marriage of Franco, sleazy material, and actors. Basically this is what Franco’s “She Killed in Ecstasy” might’ve been like if it were based on a Marquis de Sade work. There’s a few slow spots here and there, but overall I actually think this is Franco’s best film. Yes, even better than my previous choice “Vampyros Lesbos” , and better than his more ‘respectable’ films like “Count Dracula” (a
Read more