Showing posts from May 13, 2012

15 Songs with the Worst Lyrics

In reverse order of suckage (Does that mean #1 sucks and blows?) I present to you the top 15 songs that have the worst lyrics ever written.

15. Mr. Roboto- Styx
Domo Origato, Mr. Roboto. WTF? No, really, WTF? A real head-scratcher even to this day. Were they trying to break into the Japanese charts or something? However, you haven't lived until you've seen Pinocchio do a karaoke version of it on one of the "Shrek" DVDs. That was all kinds of awesome. This version however? It’s like the worst science-fiction movie put into song lyrics. So, I guess it’s kinda like “Battlefield: Earth”.

14. Buses and Trains- Bachelor Girl
Hopefully in the years since Aussie pop one-hit wonders Bachelor Girl were last heard of, they have learnt that falling in love is completely different to getting hit by a bus or train. I'm pretty sure that if you fall in love, you probably won't die or suffer permanent brain damage. At least, I’d certainly hope not. I mean, what kind of kinky tant…

Review: Gun

Curtis ‘50 Cent’ Jackson is perhaps ironically cast as a guy named Rich (see, ‘coz he’s only got half a dollar!), a mid-level Detroit arms dealer. He’s looking to expand his currently modest trade with the help of the mysterious Gabriella (AnnaLynne McCord) and her big-time employer, gun runner John Larroquette. Meanwhile, Val Kilmer plays Angel, a recently released ex-con who once knew Rich in prison, and decides to take up Rich’s offer to join his gang, to the annoyance of Rich’s comrades (Hassan Johnson and Charles Malik Winfield). However, just as a big deal is about to go down, Gabriella informs Rich that he appears to have a mole in his team, informing the cops. In the words of Eddie Murphy’s Mr. Robinson: Who could dat be? James Remar and Paul Caulderon play the frustrated cops who might finally be able to nail Rich. Danny Trejo plays a rival whom Rich clashes with.

Directed by Jessy Terrero (“Soul Plane”, of all films) and scripted by none other than 50 Cent himself, this 2010…

Review: The Killing

Tough crim Johnny Clay (Sterling Hayden) is at the helm of a racetrack robbery, set to steal all the cash in broad daylight, during the races. Among his accomplices are; cop and gambling addict Randy (Ted De Corsia), racetrack bartender O’Reilly (Joseph Sawyer) who has a sick wife to care for, and racetrack cashier George Peatty (Elisha Cook Jr.), an insecure man who makes the mistake of blabbing to his scheming and unfaithful wife (Marie Windsor, in her element). She then schemes with her lover (Vince Edwards) to take the profits. The otherwise careful Clay never quite counted on that, and the robbery plans get further screwed up from there. Jay C. Flippen plays Marvin, a somewhat elderly, mild-mannered accountant who fronts up the money through embezzlement in order to hire hulking wrestler (Maurice Oboukhoff) and creepy, psychotic sniper (Timothy Carey) to create diversions for the robbery. Oboukhoff is meant to start a big fight, whilst deadly accurate Carey is meant to shoot a ho…