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Showing posts from March 3, 2019

Review: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Soldiers Duke (Channing Tatum) and Ripcord (Marlon Wayans) are assigned by NATO to deliver warheads sold by weapons expert James McCullen (Christopher Eccleston), when they are ambushed by Baroness (Sienna Miller), whom Duke recognises as his ex, Ana Lewis. They are rescued by Scarlett (Rachel Nichols), Snake Eyes (Ray Park), Breaker (Said Taghmaoui), and Heavy Duty (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje), who are members of G.I. Joe, a team of elite soldiers headed by Gen. Hawk (stoic Dennis Quaid), who relieves the soldiers of the warhead and eventually is convinced to let them join the team. Meanwhile, McCullen really, really, really wants those weapons, as they contain high-tech nanotechnology, little bugs that can multiply quickly and eat through metal. He hopes to target landmarks like the Eiffel Tower, and cause world chaos. Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays The Doctor, an associate of McCullen’s, who is the brother of Baroness and former best friend of Duke. Byung-hung Lee is Storm Shadow, the ev…

Review: The Disaster Artist

A film that details the making of the infamously bad movie “The Room”, directed by the bizarre and incompetent Tommy Wiseau (James Franco). Dave Franco plays Greg Sestero, a struggling actor who joins forces on the project with his friend Tommy, whilst Ari Graynor, Jacki Weaver, and Josh Hutchison all play actors from “The Room”. Megan Mullally plays Greg’s worried mother who doesn’t understand what the clearly older and untalented Wiseau wants with her son.


I’m a lover of movies that are ‘so bad, they’re funny’, although I get annoyed whenever someone chooses to term them ‘so bad, they’re good’, a term that just makes zero sense to me. These are the types of people who think Ed Wood’s “Plan 9 From Outer Space” to be too entertaining to be called the ‘Worst Movie Ever Made’. Nope, “Plan 9” earned that distinction, I’d rather Edward D. Wood Jr.’s craptacular magnum opus be afforded that lofty throne rather than something truly bad but completely boring like say “Eraserhead”, “Equus”, o…

Review: Solo: A Star Wars Story

As the title suggests, an origin story for loveable rogue Han Solo (Alden Ehrenreich), who goes on all manner of space adventures whilst trying to find his way back to his lady-love Qi’ra (Emilia Clarke). Along the way we also learn that Solo isn’t his surname by birth. Woody Harrelson and Thandie Newton play a couple of roguish smugglers Han meets during his time fighting in a war. Paul Bettany plays a criminal who takes up with Qi’ra in Han’s absence. Donald Glover plays cool smuggler Lando Calrissian, current owner of a fast ship named The Millennium Falcon.


The first “Star Wars” movie since “The Clone Wars” animated movie that I didn’t see in cinemas, this 2018 film from director-for-hire Ron Howard (who peaked as a director with the excellent “Parenthood”) and screenwriting father-and-son duo Jake Kasdan (director of “Bad Teacher” and the even worse “Sex Tape”) and Lawrence Kasdan (“The Empire Strikes Back”, writer-director of “Body Heat”) is the biggest disappointment in the fra…

Review: The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

The Pevensie kids (William Moseley, Georgie Henley, Anna Popplewell, and Skandar Keynes) are one year-removed from the events of “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe”, but when they are once again magically whisked away to the land of Narnia, they find that 1300 years have passed over there, and the land has much changed. And not for the better. The land is now ruled by the Spaniards...er...the Telmarines, led by the usurping Sergio Castelitto, who has taken the throne from his own nephew Prince Caspian (Ben Barnes). Caspian has been forced to flee (his uncle wanting him dead) to the forests where he finds traces of Old Narnia, i.e. The native Narnian creatures and animals, and a small resistance, led by dwarf Trumpkin (the wonderful Peter Dinklage). It appears that it is Caspian who has summoned the ‘Sons of Adam and Daughters of Eve’ back to Narnia to help rid the land of evil once and for all. But what of Aslan, he has apparently been MIA for centuries, and yet little Lucy claims…