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Showing posts from April 10, 2016

Review: Eraser

Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Krueger, a Federal Marshal and Witness Relocation guy whose particular expertise is erasing all trace of the witness’ lives as he relocates them so they can eventually testify in court. He is assigned the task of protecting Lee (Vanessa Williams) a secretary with a top hi-tech weapons company who has proof of dodgy dealings between her company and foreign countries. Needless to say Krueger will have a tough task as some very bad people want Lee not just erased, but actually dead for realsies. Yes, I just used the non-word realsies in a review. I feel no shame. Actually, I do. I pride myself on my way with words, after this review I will quietly sit in the corner to wallow in shame. Or not. Anyway. James Caan plays Krueger’s superior, James Coburn plays the superior’s superior, James Cromwell plays Lee’s corrupt boss, Roma Maffia is Lee’s reporter friend, Robert Pastorelli plays a mob informant, Joe Viterelli is a mob boss, Patrick Kilpatrick and Nick Chi

Review: Premature

John Karna plays high schooler Rob, who endures a very, very bad day that never seems to end. For starters, the day begins with his mother walking in on him after having a wet dream. Then it’s off to school and an interview with a perspective college (represented by Alan Tudyk), which goes horribly bad when he exacerbates the college interviewer’s depression over a break-up. You’d think an after school ‘study session’ with a clearly keen (and possibly nympho) blonde classmate (Carlson Young) would end the day well, but…that’s when things get weird. Really weird. As in, Rob prematurely ejaculates at the slightest touch of his leg, and all of a sudden he wakes up the next day in bed. Only it’s not the next day, as mum walks in on his post-wet dream visage, and before long Rob realises that the same awful day is repeating itself. But why ? His best friends Stanley (Craig Roberts) and Gabrielle (Katie Findlay) are concerned, but try to be as supportive as possible, as Rob tries to fin

Review: Last Knights

Clive Owen plays Raiden, loyal soldier to Lord Bartok (Morgan Freeman), who has tired of the corruption he sees before him and decides to make his beliefs known. This earns him the ire of scheming, corrupt official Gezza Mott (Aksel Hennie), a subordinate of the Emperor (Peyman Moaadi). A disagreement between Lord Bartok and Gezza Mott sees the former put on trial, and the result of that trial is not good and places a very, very heavy burden on Raiden who is put in the role of having to administer punishment. Left completely distraught, guilt-ridden, and disillusioned Raiden (who has a wife, played by Ayelet Zurer) takes to drinking and whores to a heavy degree. He is a broken man, and now that he and his fellow soldiers (Cliff Curtis among them) have been disbanded, no real code to live by. All the while, Gezza Mott lives in fear of retaliation for his part in what happened to Raiden’s master. But if Raiden is such a mess that even his fellow soldiers no longer enjoy his company,

Review: Captain Kidd

Charles Laughton plays the title 17 th century Scottish-born pirate captain tasked by England’s King William III (veteran character actor Henry Daniell) to protect a treasure-filled ship from unscrupulous pirates off the coast of Madagascar. He asks to choose his crew amongst men who have been condemned, including Adam Mercy (Randolph Scott). What the naïve King doesn’t know, being a pirate and completely lacking a moral compass, Kidd (who we see engaging in some plundering and murdering at the outset) decides to rob the very vessel he has been assigned to protect, along with his scummy cohorts Gilbert Roland and Sheldon Leonard. Turning up on the ship is Povey (John Carradine and his marvellous deep voice), a former comrade of Kidd’s, who was left for dead in the opening sequence, whilst there proves much more to prisoner Mercy than meets the eye. Reginald Owen plays Kidd’s attaché, whom the Captain hopes will teach him proper etiquette. Barbara Britton plays Lady Anne Falconer,

Review: The Turning Point

Former ballet dancer Shirley MacLaine gets a chance to reunite with old colleagues and friends when her old New York ballet company comes to her town. Having left to marry fellow dancer Tom Skerritt and raise a family, MacLaine’s two kids are aspiring dancers, with daughter Leslie Browne a possible star in the making. Old friend (and rival) Anne Bancroft, the aging star of the group decides to take Browne under her wing, which starts to rub MacLaine the wrong way, as old wounds slowly bubble to the surface. Meanwhile, Browne (whose real-life parents’ story actual inspired this story) also takes up with young stud dancer Mikhail Baryshnikov (Both are former real-life dancers making their film debuts and were rewarded with Oscar nominations). Martha Scott plays the grand old lady of the company, and Anthony Zerbe turns up as an old acquaintance and orchestra conductor.   Nominated for 11 Academy Awards including Best Picture, but walking away empty handed is this 1977 ballet dr

Review: South Sea Woman

  Set during WWII with Marine Gunnery Sergeant Burt Lancaster facing court martial for desertion, theft, and several other charges. It’s got something to do with his war buddy Chuck Connors (in his first major role), and the displaced showgirl Connors plans on marrying (Virginia Mayo), but we only gradually learn the details. Lancaster refuses to defend himself on the stand, choosing to stay mute, though Mayo appears to want Lancaster to defend himself against the charges, and his attorney brings in witnesses nonetheless. Flashbacks tell us the story of how this predicament came about, whilst occasionally coming back to the courtroom scene. Veola Vonn plays Mme. Duval, a hotel owner on the Vichy French island of Namou, who is called upon to testify at one point.   A lesser-known Burt Lancaster film, this one was released the same year as the much more popular “From Here to Eternity” in 1953. Based on a play by William Rankin (who wrote the story “Fighting Father Dunne” was ba