Shameless Self Expression

A monsignor (Rupert Davies) arrives in a local village to visit his widowed sister-in-law (Marion Mathie) and niece (Veronica Carlson). He is dismayed to find a town full of superstitious people still living in fear of the supposedly vanquished vampire Count Dracula (Christopher Lee). Even the local priest (Ewan Hooper) has become an alcoholic. In an ill-fated attempt at exorcising the demons inside Castle Dracula by the monsignor, the drunk priest injures himself and his blood inadvertently resurrects the Count! Whilst Dracula makes the priest his vampire-bitten lackey, the monsignor is busy dealing with his niece’s choice for a suitor – an atheist! Played by Barry Andrews, this non-believer might just have to find something to believe in as he and the monsignor do battle with the evil vampire Count. Barbara Ewing plays a saucy barmaid named Zena, who also falls victim to Count Dracula.   1968 entry into Hammer’s Dracula series from director Freddie Francis ( “Dr. Terror’s Ho...

Unethical medical student Shane Briant gets nabbed by the police for body snatching and subsequently sentenced to an asylum. It turns out that the Dr. Victor (Peter Cushing) who works at the asylum is actually Baron Frankenstein, whom Briant is an avid admirer of. Having blackmailed the asylum head, Dr. Victor conducts his creature-creating experiments within the asylum walls, and Briant becomes his new surgical assistant. Meanwhile, the asylum’s patients start mysteriously dying. Funny that. Doe-eyed Madeline Smith plays a mute girl, whilst future Darth Vader costume-wearer David Prowse plays the ape-like Creature.   1974 Terence Fisher ( “The Horror of Dracula” , “The Mummy” , “The Man Who Could Cheat Death” , “The Hound of the Baskervilles” ) film was the last in Hammer’s Frankenstein series, and as with their final Dracula entrant “The Satanic Rites of Dracula” , it’s not hard to see why . It’s bloody ordinary. Scripted by Anthony Hinds ( “The Curse of the Werewolf” , “Rasp...

Angelina Jolie plays a PTSD-suffering ‘smoke jumper’ (specially-trained wildfire firefighters who traditionally parachute in) forced to protect a 12 year-old boy (Aussie actor Finn Little) from a pair of cold-blooded assassins (Aiden Gillen, Nicholas Hoult) who want him dead after he witnessed them kill his father (Jake Weber). Dear ‘ol dad was a forensic accountant who worked for the DA, and when said DA gets murdered by the assassins, Weber fears he’s next, going on the run with son in tow. The idea was to stay with Weber’s brother-in-law, a deputy sheriff played by Jon Bernthal. Obviously, that plan didn’t pan out and now the kid must rely on an adrenaline junkie firefighter who has lost her way after a fatal incident on the job. Tyler Perry turns up as the mysterious employer of the two assassins.   Although some seem to have found it a bit disappointing, I found this 2021 thriller from director Taylor Sheridan (writer of “Sicario” and “Hell or High Water” ) and his co-wri...

Isabel May plays a 17 year-old student with a hunter/survivalist father (Thomas Jane), who teaches her in the opening scene about the mercy killing of a deer she has shot but has not quite died. Speaking of death, May’s mother (Radha Mitchell) recently passed from cancer, and May feels her ex-military dad hasn’t quite grieved her yet. One day at school, a van literally crashes through the cafeteria, as recently suspended Eli Brown (unconvincing) and his followers Cyrus Arnold, Britton Sear, and Catherine Davis mow down student and faculty alike, and quickly take the rest of the inhabitants of the school by hostage. Being in the bathroom at the time, May is able to roam free and enact some of her father’s teachings. Meanwhile, the best friend who has a crush on her (Olly Sholotan) is forced by the young terrorists to film everything. Treat Williams and Barbara Crampton are wasted as a local lawman and teacher, respectively.   Although initially watchable to some extent, this 202...

Special Forces soldier Cuba Gooding Jr., still troubled by the death of his superior (Ray Winstone, absolutely wasted), leads a crew of badarses to an underground facility somewhere in the Middle East to locate missing scientist (archaeologist, more accurately) Ron Perlman. Valerie Cruz is his somewhat secretive daughter, who is responsible for hiring Gooding and his crew, which includes lesbian medic Taryn Manning, wimpy hacker Brandon Fobbs, smart-arse communications guy Zack Ward, as well as Stephanie Jacobsen and standard action man Jason London. It’s not long before the team realises some freaky stuff is going on here, with Henry Rollins playing a babbling priest with a serious case of acne, and Bill Moseley turning up as a zombified nutter. Before you can say ‘Zombies!- Run!!!’, our team are splitting off, hallucinating and generally ending up dead. Gee, did Cruz forget to mention the zombies, the blood, and the dying? Oops. Funny that. Well, at least Ward gets to hallucinate a h...