Shameless Self Expression

Behrouz Vossoughi leads a group of Iranian terrorists who kidnap the daughter of the President of the United States (William Smith!). It’s the usual ‘release 55 of my brothers currently held as Israeli prisoners’ deal. The president calls upon ONE MAN, special forces op and martial arts trained Hack Stone (played by you guessed it…Frank Stallone) to resolve the situation. Actually, more precisely to…assist the FBI and LAPD (the latter represented by Cameron Mitchell) in resolving the situation. Adding a personal touch to the story, Stone and the lead terrorist used to be comrades in arms at one point when Stone worked for the CIA. However, things soured when Vossoughi’s family were murdered in an incident he blames Stone for. He wanted the bad guys killed, Stone wanted them to face judicial process. They escaped custody…   Clearly a better musician than actor (‘Far From Over’ kicks arse), Frank Stallone has nonetheless managed to use the family name to help carve out a relative...

Vincent Price is Edward Lionheart, a fourth-rate ham Shakespearean actor who seeks bloody revenge on the savage critics who he blames for destroying his acting career. Dame Diana Rigg plays Lionheart’s daughter, Milo O’Shea a Scotland Yard detective, Eric Sykes as O’Shea’s partner. The group of snooty critics are played by Ian Hendry, Robert Morley, Jack Hawkins, Arthur Lowe, Coral Browne, Harry Andrews, Dennis Price (no relation), Robert Coote, and Sir Michael Hordern.   ***** SPOILER-FILLED REVIEW ***** It’s impossible to review this film properly without spoiling the ‘fun’ in the Shakespearean death scenes. Save the review for after you’ve watched the film. Which you should always do anyway… *****   Director Douglas Hickox ( “Entertaining Mr. Sloane” , “Sky Riders” ) and screenwriter Anthony Greville-Bell ( “The New Spartans” ) give Vincent Price the role he was perhaps born to play in this violent, macabre horror-comedy from 1973. Throw in an outstanding supportin...

The journey of a poor young girl in 1800s England as she goes from cruelly-treated orphan girl (played by Peggy Ann Garner) to adulthood as a governess (now played by Joan Fontaine). As a child she is cruelly punished by headmaster Brocklehurst (Henry Daniell), whilst as an adult her employer is the dashing but brooding and tortured Mr. Rochester (Orson Welles), who seems to be keeping something peculiar locked up in a tower cell. Elizabeth Taylor plays childhood Jane’s only friend at the orphanage, John Sutton plays Dr. Rivers, one of the only other sympathetic figures from Jane’s childhood. Margaret O’Brien plays adult Jane’s young ward, whilst Agnes Moorehead plays Jane’s thoroughly unpleasant Aunt, and Hillary Brooke plays the current lady in Rochester’s life, the aptly named Blanche.   This 1944 adaptation of the Charlotte Bronte classic from director Robert Stevenson (Best known for “Mary Poppins” and the underrated “Bedknobs and Broomsticks” ) and his co-writers Aldous ...

Greek tycoon Glenn Ford (!) hires freelance operative Chuck Connors to retrieve a mysterious document that was on a sunken yacht somewhere in Mexico. The yacht also supposedly contained valuable treasure. Assorted fortune hunters turn up at the same Mexican resort as Connors, including mute Richard Roundtree and frequently shirtless Jorge Rivero. Susana Dosamantes plays the token female (after Jill St. John supposedly walked off set), whilst Henry Silva briefly appears as a Mexican police chief.   AKA “Day of the Assassin” , though the on-screen title uses the plural. Showing every bit the troubled production, let alone every bit the film co-directed by the man behind “Turkey Shoot” , is this largely dreadful cheapie from 1979. Co-directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith (the aforementioned “Turkey Shoot” as well as the quite good “The Man From Hong Kong” ) and the film’s producer Carlos Vasallo, this is the infamous Spanish-Mexican-American co-production where several of the cast an...

Gregg Henry has recently inherited some land, he and his idiot friends (Chris Lemmon, Jamie Rose, Deborah Benson, and Ralph Seymour) head off in an RV to view it. They need to go through mountain terrain to get there, and are duly warned by crazed local Mike Kellin and local ranger George Kennedy that they best turn back. It seems that there’s folks up in those mountains who are hostile to any visitors. Very, very hostile indeed.   Kind of a mixture of “Deliverance” (and a forerunner to) 2003’s underrated “Wrong Turn” , this 1981 slasher-esque film is from filmmaker Jeff Lieberman who also made “Squirm” and the mediocre “Satan’s Little Helper” . This one is flawed but clearly a cut above the usual horror flick released in the early 80s. It’s very obviously too slow-moving, and the characters aren’t exactly the most intelligent bunch. However, I’d still watch this film over any of the “Friday the 13 th ” films any day of the week, let alone all of the imitators and rip-offs. I...