Shameless Self Expression

Based on a true story, Max Pomeranc stars as young Josh whose sports writer dad (a terrific Joe Mantegna) introduces him to chess and before long realises that the kid’s got a knack for it. Whilst dad gets professional chess tutor Pandolfini (Sir Ben Kingsley) to coach Josh, mother Joan Allen frets that the boy is missing out on what childhood is really about. Laurence Fishburne plays Josh’s other chess mentor, a flashy speed chess hustler. William H. Macy plays the father of another player, Dan Hedaya is a chess tournament official, Robert Stephens plays the mentor of Josh’s chief rival, and Laura Linney appears as Josh’s school teacher.   Despite being an occasional (and not very good) recreational player of chess for most of my life, 13 year-old me had zero interest in seeing something like this 1993 chess drama from writer-director Steven Zaillian ( “A Civil Action” , “Schindler’s List” ). so it’s now at age 45 that I finally caught up with it and I’m really glad I did. Bas...

Set multiple decades before “X” , Mia Goth stars as Pearl whose husband (Alistair Sewell) is off fighting in WWI. Pearl is stuck doing chores for her humourless mother (Tandi Wright) and tending to her decrepit, disabled father (Matthew Sunderland), whilst dreaming of being a dancer and leaving the family farm. Pearl also starts seeing a projectionist (David Corenswet). Oh, and she’s also coming apart at the seams and on the verge of a homicidal rampage.   You’re either on the same wavelength as director Ti West and co-writer/star Mia Goth or you’re…me. Yeah, I’m gonna annoy you today, apologies in advance. Seriously, I hated this 2022 film before the end of the opening credits. That’s a new record for me. Mr. West needs to learn that if you put ‘starring’ before every actor in the credits, you diminish the meaning of that word. Meanwhile, the colour, font, and music gave off Douglas Sirk vibes a little too much for my palette, and Mia Goth’s performance is far too ‘put-on’. A...

After accidentally killing his best friend in a match, former top MMA fighter Scott Adkins now barely scrapes by fighting in street tussles in Bangkok, Thailand. Rich American Robert Knepper offers Adkins a heck of a sweet deal for one fight: $500,000. He agrees and is soon flown to the Myanmar jungle where he quickly realises Knepper has fed him to the wolves. Knepper is the head of an organised game hunt, where the game being hunted is human! Rhona Mitra and Temuera Morrison are among the other blood-thirsty hunters.   The king of the direct-to-DVD sequel director Roel Reine ( “The Marine 2” , “Death Race 2” , “12 Rounds 2: Reloaded” , “The Man With the Iron Fists 2” , “The Condemned 2” ) collaborates with the king of the direct-to-DVD action movie Scott Adkins for this perfectly fine 2016 sequel to the JCVD/John Woo ‘classic’. To be honest, all this variant of “The Most Dangerous Game” needed to do was be better than “Turkey Shoot” and “The Condemned” , and indeed it does ...

I’d seen snippets of the infamous Chris Holmes interview but this was my first time watching this 1988 documentary (or is it a mockumentary?) from filmmaker Penelope Spheeris. I wasn’t impressed with the pathetic display from Holmes, and I’m even less impressed having learned that a lot of what we see here in this film is either fake or elements are staged by Spheeris. A documentary on the 80s glam metal scene in L.A., Spheeris has confirmed some of the moments depicted here were staged, the artists involved have claimed some of it was staged too. For instance, Holmes mostly had pool water in that vodka bottle. However, if you think all this means I’m going to put Spheeris on blast for making a fake documentary that mocks the mid-80s L.A. glam metal scene unfairly you’ve stumbled onto the wrong review, my friend. These posers (some high profile posers, I might add) still agreed to be presented in this way and deserve a lot of the blame. Staging/editing and substance abuse can only tak...

The mostly untrue story of music parody specialist Weird Al Yankovic (Daniel Radcliffe), his rise to fame, his struggles to gain the approval of his father (Toby Huss), and his supposedly torrid love affair with Madonna (Evan Rachel Wood).   I think my fandom of comedian and musical parodist Weird Al Yankovic is probably reflective of some of you out there: I was a big fan until I stopped recognising the music he was parodying. For me that was around the time of the Running With Scissors album where I really only recognised three of the parodies and didn’t much like any of them. For you, it might’ve been an earlier or later album. I still listen to the earlier albums regularly and I think Al seems like a heck of a nice guy, but I stopped listening to new music (outside of some legacy artists) by and large around 1999 so his parodies were often a bit lost on me by that point. I was excited when I heard that someone was doing a biopic on Al, and although I naturally assumed th...

In 17 th Century Russia, a princess (Barbara Steele) is accused and convicted of vampirism and witchcraft. She is subsequently befitted with a spiked iron mask and burned at the stake. Cut to the 19 th Century professor Andrea Checchi and doctor John Richardson happen upon the chapel where the coffin holding the deceased princess is located. They accidentally revive her whilst one of them is tussling with a bat. Now the revived witch sets her sights on her descendant, Katya (also Steele).   One of the most important and influential Italian horror films ever made, this 1960 witchcraft story is also the best-remembered film in the career of Mario Bava ( “Danger Diabolik” , “Seven Dolls for an August Moon” ). Personally, I slightly prefer his “Kill, Baby…Kill” and “Black Sabbath” , but this film is nonetheless an undeniable classic. Bava was his own cinematographer, and he’s created a foggy, Gothic B&W work of art here. It’s probably Tim Burton’s idea of a wet dream, and wh...

During WWI, a German U-boat commanded by Capt. Von Schoenvorts (John McEnery, apparently dubbed by Anton Diffring) sinks a cargo boat. That boat’s passengers (Doug McClure and Susan Penhaligon among them) wrangle their way aboard the sub when it rises to the surface. After some scuffling, the two parties agree to a tenuous truce until they can find suitable neutral land to port. Instead, they losing their way and end up on an island called Caprona, which houses dinosaurs,   neanderthals, and a volcano. Anthony Ainley plays German Lt. Dietz, who is our obligatory disruptive mutineer.   Average adventure film from Amicus Films may as well have been titled “The Sub That Wasted Time and Forgot to Go Somewhere” . Directed by Kevin Connor ( “From Beyond the Grave” , “Motel Hell” , the much better “The People That Time Forgot” ), it’s at least 30 minutes before we get out of the submarine an onto land. Which means it’s 30 minutes worth of a submarine movie, and that’s not what I ...