Review: Godzilla vs. Megalon

An underwater civilisation known as Seatopia has been affected by the nuclear testing of Japanese surface-dwelling society, and the toga-wearing Seatopians are pretty well pissed off by it at this stage. Their measure of revenge against the above-ground Japanese folk is to send out the giant titular monster to punish them. Japan’s only hopes appear to be Godzilla and the latest creation of inventor Katsuhiko Sasaki: A robot called Jet Jaguar. To even things out, the Seatopians also enlist the evil aid of previous Godzilla foe Gigan.

One of the more enjoyable 70s Godzilla films, this 1974 film from director Jun Fukuda (“Godzilla vs. Ebirah”, “Son of Godzilla”) and co-writer Shinichi Sekizawa (“Mothra”, “Godzilla vs. Monster Zero”, “Godzilla vs. Gigan”) is good campy fun, if a bit short. I mean, this is a film that is less than 80 minutes long but needs to find room for humans, toga-wearing humanoid villains (!!), cameo-playing evil aliens, Godzilla, Jet Jaguar, Anguirus, Rodan, Megalon, and Gigan (lent to the Seatopians by the aforementioned aliens)? It somehow manages to work in at least two car chases, too. Surprisingly it’s not too much of a problem that it affects the overall score. Besides, it doesn’t hang around long enough to get boring, the film’s always on the go. Best of all, the monsters (and robots, in the case of Jet Jaguar) are all a lot of fun. This is the film I had hoped “Godzilla vs. Gigan” would be, but wasn’t.

Godzilla does tend to play 3^rd or 4^th fiddle here, which may disappoint some and Gigan isn’t in the film enough either. It’s certainly an issue, but for me Megalon, Jet Jaguar, and all the tanks and explosions are enough to keep this one afloat. Even the humans are pretty OK. In fact, if there’s a real problem with Godzilla it’s the suit design, it’s too docile and friendly-looking. And a bit too cheap-looking, even by Toho standards. Megalon, the titular monster controlled by this film’s inevitable alien invader villains, is one of the ugliest monster creations in Toho history. That’s not a complaint. It’s a truly ugly blend of a cockroach and Gigan. There’s a particularly fun aerial squadron attack on Megalon, who we learn can walk, hop, and fly. Megalon also has a metal sphincter mouth and shoots brown pellets out of it. You watch the film and tell me I’m wrong. As for Gigan, he may not be in the film as much as I’d like, but when he literally bursts on the scene nearly an hour into the film, it’s to the film’s improvement. He’s unsurprisingly on Megalon’s side as another villain-controlled monster. They make for a fun tag team (though the shoulder-slice is clearly stock footage from the previous “Godzilla vs. Gigan”), so much so I would’ve loved to have seen them square off against The Hart Foundation or Demolition. Keeping with the theme, at one point Jet Jaguar Gorilla Press Slams Gigan, whilst Godzilla breathes its blue fire on the latter. It’s brilliant, whilst Godzilla dropkicking Megalon and pretty much repeatedly slamming the shit out of him by its tail is fun, too. Wrestling jokes/references aside, I really do think Gigan’s an underrated kaiju. Jet Jaguar is so damn cool. A robot rather than a monster, it’s one of the coolest-looking things I’ve seen, and made me want a Jet Jaguar series of films (I bet prog rock band Styx are a fan of Jet Jaguar). On the downside, the Seatopians prove pretty ineffective outside of using monsters to do their bidding. They’re not even all that threatening against a small boy. So that’s a shame. However, I care more about entertainment than good storytelling/good character writing, or at least I score based more on the former than latter.

Considered by many to be among the worst Godzilla movies, but I think for pure non-think entertainment, this one delivers the goods. It’s a bit too short perhaps and Godzilla isn’t given a very good showing. Call it a good kaiju movie rather than a good Godzilla movie, but there’s never a dull moment and the action is terrific. Now where’s my Jet Jaguar movie, damn it?!

Rating: B-