Review: Curse of the Weeping Woman

 

Set in the 70s, Linda Cardellini is a social worker and recently widowed mother of two, her husband a cop who died in the line of duty. When we meet her she’s on the job, visiting Patricia Velasquez, whose kids were reported truant from school. She finds the boys locked in the closet, whilst Velasquez babbles on about being stalked by ‘La Llorona’, AKA The Weeping Woman, a 17th Century Mexican folktale. Velasquez is chucked in the slammer and her two kids taken into care. However, not long after the two boys turn up dead. If you’ve ever seen a curse/haunting-related horror film before you’ll be unsurprised to find that soon Cardellini’s kids, and then Cardellini herself start to have visions of La Llorona. Cardellini seeks the counsel of Father Perez (Tony Amendola), who puts her in touch with an ex-priest with more knowledge and experience in such spooky matters (Raymond Cruz). He attempts to cleanse Cardellini’s abode of evil. Sean Patrick Thomas plays a cop who starts to question Cardellini’s state of mind and fitness to look after her own kids.

 

The best I can say for this weak-arse horror pic from debut feature director Michael Chaves and writers Mikki Daughtry (The cystic fibrosis romance “Five Feet Apart”) & Tobias Iaconis (“Five Feet Apart” and “Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia”, of all things) is that it’s slightly better than “Annabelle” (Producer James Wan serves that same function here, hence my reference to that film). Also, unlike “The Nun”, I didn’t turn this one off before it was over. I actually finished watching it. Yay, praise! Other than that, Linda Cardellini proves yet again to be talented and beautiful in equal measure, and Raymond Cruz looks suitably tortured and pained as the resident expert in witchypoo nonsense. They’re far too good for this tedious bullshit, which despite its origins in 19th Century Mexican folklore plays an awful lot like a typically dreary, PG-13 J-horror film right down to the boring backstory (Turns out it was given an R in the States, but a pretty mild R it must be said). It’s not my kind of horror, and it’s not even especially good-looking, which you can at least normally depend on with these weak-arse horror films of late. Meanwhile, like nearly every horror film of the last 20 years or so, this one overindulges in cheapjack ‘jump’ scares instead of opting for genuine terror. And also like nearly every horror film of the last 20 years or so, the filmmakers have no idea how to make those ‘jump’ scares genuinely effective. If you employ too many of them, all you’re doing is pissing me off with cheap tricks.

 

Tedious and uninvolving, despite the presence of a couple of decent actors, especially Cardellini. If this is the best lead role she’s being offered, it ain’t worth the cheque. Nothing to see here, move along. I’ve already spent enough words on this forgettable horror fluff.

 

Rating: C-

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