Review: 537 Votes

A look at the fiasco that was the 2000 American Federal Election, an election circus that was partly exacerbated by tensions among the Cuban-American community over the then-Clinton Administration’s handling of the Elian Gonzalez refugee case. An election that would become a total disaster with hanging chads, MIA mayors, and an infamous recount, resulting in the eventual election of Luckiest Guy in America (albeit depending on your political persuasion), George Dubya Bush.

 

Although it’s a tad dry and probably more useful to Americans, this Billy Corben documentary from 2020 will likely still satisfy political nerds, of which I count myself one. It’s interesting viewing this the same year as an American election which Toddler-in-Chief Former President Trump tried to pass off as somewhat similarly fraudulent as the 2000 U.S. Federal Election. That crazy election is this documentary’s subject. A documentary that’ll give you ‘Hanging Chads’ (Only in America can you get Hanging, Pregnant, or Indented Chads, right? Chad. So American), as well as now somewhat forgotten figures as young Elian Gonzalez, Janet Reno, and this film’s kicking can, one Alex Penelas. Holy fuck, is this guy the slimiest, cowardly flop of a politician you’re likely to come across. Seriously, this film is like 100 minutes of people talking shit about Penelas, a then Florida mayor tipped for greater things, and popular among the Cuban-American community. Then this shit happened, and Penelas (who arguably encouraged the cultural tension, thus fucking the Democratic Party he actually belonged to) was suddenly Mr. MIA. I think Gore was always destined to lose with spineless, self-serving schmucks like Penelas supposedly on his side of the political fence.

 

It was quite an enjoyable trip down memory lane with the story of young Elian, who captured the hearts of much of the world as politicians and law-makers fought over where the little boy should live. Whether it was Bush or Gore, pretty much everyone got political on the Elian Gonzalez issue, a shameful misappropriation of a child no matter which country you feel he should’ve been sent to live.

 

However, I think the film stays on Elian’s story for a few minutes too long. It’s quite a long way until we get to election night here. Once we do get to the nuts and bolts of the situation in Florida on election night…Jesus, the recount situation was even more of a shit-show than I remembered it being. Bush had a relative at Fox News who called Florida early for Bush? Gore retracted his concession? Christ, what a balls up. And just when you think it can’t get any worse, Pat Buchanan turns up to play an unwitting part in it all. Two quotes from Late Night TV shown in the film speak for us all, John Stewart with ‘Holy Fucking Shit!’ and Wanda Sykes with a subsequent ‘Fuck Florida! Lop it off!’. Indeed, Ms. Sykes. By contrast, the clips from “SNL” at the time are almost entirely unfunny and not very clever (Darrell Hammond was the MVP of that show at the time, his Clinton was iconic and his Gore spot-on. The rest of the political humour on there at the time…about as funny as it is in recent seasons: Hardly at all). Look, I don’t know if Gore really won and was robbed or not (He likely did and probably was). I don’t know if it was ineptitude or chicanery in Florida, or if it was a fair result at the end. All I know is that the entire election that particular year was an embarrassing shit-show like the one 2020 has been, albeit 2000 was on a much smaller scale. This was a disaster long before the Chads got involved.

 

An interesting look at a total shitshow, though I think this documentary will resonate with and interest Americans most of all. Still, if you were alive and watching TV at the time, this is certainly a trip down embarrassing memory lane. I’m not the biggest Gore fan in the world, but it sure is interesting to ponder where America – and likely the entire world – would be had Gore been elected President. Thankfully Mr. Gore would get some measure of revenge against Mr. Penelas. Fuck that no-showing, spineless weasel (Is this the swearing-est review you’ve ever read or what? Politics will do that to you, I guess).

 

Rating: B-