Review: The Poison Rose

Supposedly set in the late 70s, John Travolta stars as a washed-up California P.I. and former high school football hero summoned to his hometown in Texas to solve a missing person’s case, whilst also revisiting his past. The latter includes stopping in on his ex (Famke Janssen) and her daughter (Ella Bleu Travolta). When someone turns up dead, Travolta ends up forgetting about the missing old lady and decides to hunt the killer instead. Let’s just say he has a personal interest in the case. Morgan Freeman plays the local bigwig, a powerful and respected club/casino owner (also known to Travolta from way back), who was the chief financial competitor to Janssen’s late husband, an oil baron. A sweaty Brendan Fraser turns up as the oddball doctor in charge of the local sanitarium, who insists the old lady is currently undergoing special treatment. Robert Patrick is seemingly the only lawman in all of Galveston, though Freeman wields all the real power. Peter Stormare turns up as a weirdo musician/gambler/barfly, and “Green Book” writer Nick Vallelonga can be seen early getting pummelled by Travolta.

 

Genuinely sad and sorry to endure, this 2019 mystery/noir from director George Gallo (writer of “Midnight Run”, director of the flop “Trapped in Paradise”), screenwriter/author Richard Salvatore (his first screenwriting effort, he previously produced Travolta’s mediocre vigilante film “I Am Wrath” and Van Damme’s even worse “Kill ‘em All”) and a bunch of actors who should’ve tried to stop this film from ever seeing the light of day. John Travolta is immediately awful in the lead role, with especially bad, poorly recorded narration in particular. It doesn’t help that his Texan accent sounds highly Southern, which even to a non-American like me, is obviously completely wrong. Travolta has been used effectively in films from time to time (“Blow Out”, “Grease”, “Look Who’s Talking”, “Get Shorty”, “Primary Colours”, “Phenomenon”, “From Paris With Love”) but more often than not he’s either terrible or exhibits terrible judgement in film projects (For the latter, look to “Stayin’ Alive”, “Battlefield Earth”, “Swordfish”, “Broken Arrow”, “The Taking of Pelham 1, 2, 3”, “Be Cool”, “Domestic Disturbance” etc). Lately he has joined Robert De Niro, Bruce Willis, Nic Cage, and John Cusack in the ‘Formerly respected stars now slumming it in direct-to-DVD/On Demand dreck. This is definitely one of the man’s worst films and one of the seemingly affable actor’s worst-ever performances. Travolta has been making bad films his entire career here and there, but it’s starting to get a bit sad now after “Gotti”, “Killing Season”, “Speed Kills” and now this shitshow. He phones it in completely, and based on the poor quality of his voiceover audio, one wonders if he’s literally phoning it in. The weird thing is Travolta co-produced the film, so one would hope he had something of an interest in the material. He certainly doesn’t act like it though, even when acting opposite real-life daughter Ella Bleu (They have strangely zero chemistry). The best that can be said of the latter is that she’s better than her dad. And believe me, the kid’s not even good and is severely lacking in presence or charisma.

 

Botox-afflicted Famke Janssen has clearly seen better days, but poor Brendan Fraser looks like he aged 30 years since his guest turn on “Scrubs” and has apparently eaten a house. I’m not being mean to any of these three actors, I feel genuinely sad about it. Fraser’s never been a great actor, but like Travolta he’s usually a fairly genial star who doesn’t always choose the best projects for himself. Apparently a last minute replacement for Forest Whitaker (This film could’ve had a “Battlefield Earth” reunion!), Fraser gives one of the worst and most amateurish turns I’ve ever seen by a known actor of fairly long tenure. He’s immediately awful, mannered and scenery-chewing  in the most self-serving way possible. I’m guessing Mr. Gallo was too busy off-camera listening to Morgan Freeman’s soothing sage voice telling cool stories to notice how badly Fraser tramples on his every scene. As for Ms. Janssen, she used to be a talented and interesting actress, but whether it’s Botox or actual plastic surgery, something has happened to the poor woman that now renders her face unable to project any emotion whatsoever. It’s not being mean, it’s criticising someone for being unable to be good at their job anymore.

 

Peter Stormare and Robert Patrick aren’t terrible, but they’re both completely wasted and unable to come close to rescuing the thing. At least the latter sounds authentically Texan to my ears, though (Funnily enough, Texas is played by Georgia and Rome, Italy respectively. So even the locations aren’t Texan!). Morgan Freeman tends to be wildly inconsistent in sinister parts, though his Academy Award-nominated turn as a vicious pimp in “Street Smart” was truly outstanding. I’m not going to say his work here is anywhere up to that standard, but he doesn’t embarrass himself like in “Hard Rain” and “Dreamcatcher”. In the film’s only truly solid performance, he brings weight and presence, if not subtlety exactly. It’s a hopeless cause however, as the script here is genuinely appalling. It takes far too late for the leading lady to turn up, and 35 minutes is also far too long for the plot to finally kick in as well. Worse, a lot of it is completely confusing and none of it interesting enough to make it worth paying closer attention to.

 

What on Earth happened here? It’s like “Chinatown” done in the style of David Lynch but by someone with the ability and sense of narrative clarity of one Edward D. Wood Jr., instead. Embarrassing wannabe neo-noir is a waste of time and talent. A cool-as-ice, quietly menacing Freeman is the only one who gets away unscathed here. Travolta and Fraser are especially bad. The film is an absolute mess, unsurprising that Lionsgate were the distributors of it. I bet there’s a fascinating story behind why this film is so incredibly bad. Meanwhile, Travolta’s career is in desperate need of yet another rescue job.

 

Rating: D-

 

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