Review: Eaten Alive

A bespectacled and dishevelled Neville Brand is the insane proprietor of the rundown Starlight Hotel who kills people and feeds them to a pet crocodile/alligator he keeps as a pet. William Finley, Marilyn Burns and young Kim Richards play a bickering family and potential victims, Carolyn Jones plays brothel owner Miss Hattie, and Robert Englund plays a sleazy creep named Buck whose favourite activity rhymes with his name. Stuart Whitman turns up as a local lawman, and Mel Ferrer is a concerned father of hooker Roberta Collins.

 

1976 cult item from director Tobe Hooper (“Texas Chainsaw Massacre”, “Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2”, “Lifeforce”) is one of those films like Jack Hill’s “Spider Baby” where it’s such a bizarre and consistently watchable experience that it doesn’t even really matter that it’s not an especially good film. More in league with “Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2” than the original “TCM”, it’s the furthest thing from subtle, but it’s so nuts that you just sit there staring at the screen wondering what on Earth all of these well-known names and faces are doing in such unabashed trash. Aside from a bored-looking Mel Ferrer, I’d say everyone’s having a hoot and a half.

 

It’s well-shot by Robert Caramico (“Blackenstein”, “KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park”, “Mean Johnny Barrows”), the sleazy Southern Gothic atmosphere is thick as it gets. Sure, there are moments where it looks oddly artificial and that may not be to everyone’s liking. I thought the phony studio set vibe kind of added to the film’s bizarro charms, but that’s just me. The tone is completely whack-a-doodle, nothing here really hangs comfortably together, but if you’re prepared for a wild ride it certainly gives it to you. I can only imagine what the conversations were like between scenes on a set that included Morticia Addams, Neville Brand, Mel Ferrer, William Finley, Stuart Whitman, Robert Englund, and an alligator. A pre-“Elm Street” Englund is hilariously sleazy as a local yokel named Buck, whom Quentin Tarantino can tell you is rather fond of fornicating (QT stole the character name and infamous line for Michael Bowen’s character in “Kill Bill Vol. 1”). Years of playing Freddy seemed to turn Englund into a one-note ham (much as I love the first and third “Elm Street” films), but before that he was actually a very capable character actor as he shows here. I’m not sure what Carolyn Jones is doing in this kind of backwater sleaze, but it’s nice to see her on screen nonetheless, even for a cameo. The most legit ‘good’ performance probably comes from ‘ol pro Stuart Whitman as the local lawman, it’s one of the better performances I’ve seen from him. Unlike Ferrer he doesn’t talk down to the material, either. He approaches the role matter-of-factly with all the nutjobs around him, but without phoning it in like Ferrer. The lead here is veteran western tough guy Neville Brand and he gives a very atypical performance. He’s a constantly muttering, unbalanced, hulking weirdo and I bet Brand was having a whale of a time not having to play second or third fiddle for a change. Englund’s nasty perve is almost funny, but Brand is actually quite unsettling at times. Everyone else is seemingly going for very black comedy, but Brand is offering up dark brutality. Like everything else here there’s nothing subtle about Brand’s performance, but he’s effectively different enough from his usual screen persona. Speaking of different, William Finley is quite simply one of the strangest actors I’ve ever seen and he’s even stranger than usual here. Everyone’s a little off-the-wall here, but this guy’s completely off the planet. Was he on drugs? Is he the drug? Was I dreaming this whole film? It’s truly insane.

 

Essentially a pre-cursor to the cult favourite “Motel Hell”, I actually think this is the more interesting film. Quite gory at times, the usage of a lurid red lighting scheme allows Hooper to get away with quite a bit of violence and gore than most American films of the time. “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” wasn’t bloodless, but Hooper tricked you into thinking it was a total bloodbath. He was quite a clever filmmaker in a way. He’s also able to…mostly get around the fact that the alligator (or is it a crocodile? I’ve read conflicting reports) is a not terribly convincing bit of FX work. On the downside is the godawful annoying electronic music score by Wayne Bell (“Texas Chainsaw Massacre”) and Hooper himself, it sounds cheap as hell and doesn’t belong at all. I also have to say that there’s a couple of scenes where not much goes on…for a bit too long. It’s a tad under 90 minutes but could’ve stood to be even a bit shorter than that. For instance, young Kyle Richards (yes, that Kyle Richards) spends a tad too long just hanging around waiting to be endangered with the alligator/crocodile.

 

It’s a mess, it’s all over the shop, but this bizarro backwater schlocker is oddly watchable and typical of Hooper it looks fantastic, too. At the very least there’s enough blood and sleazy T&A if you’re into that sort of thing. It works…sort of, though the tone shifts wildly. A definite drive-in movie if ever I’ve seen one, where else are you gonna find Morticia Addams, Freddy Krueger, an alligator, and a familiar actor getting it in the neck with a scythe? (A great bit, for what it’s worth). Absolutely not recommended to anyone looking for a legit good film, but worthwhile for a cult audience. It works best if you don’t think about Hooper’s infamous (and better) previous film and take it as a B-grade backwoods version of Hitchcock’s “Psycho”. The screenplay is by Alvin L. Fast (“Black Shampoo”, “Satan’s Cheerleaders”), Mardi Rustam (writer-director of “Evils of the Night” co-starring Brand), and an assist by Kim Henkel (“Texas Chainsaw Massacre”).

 

Rating: B-