Review: Pass the Ammo

Set in Arkansas, Bill Paxton and his trashy girlfriend Linda Kozlowski, along with Kozlowski’s two criminal cousins (Dennis Burkley and Glenn Withrow) attempt to rob the ‘Tower of Bethlehem’, the TV studio home of greedy husband and wife TV evangelists Tim Curry and Annie Potts. All of this apparently stems from Curry having conned Kozlowski’s dying grandmother out of her life savings (not that Kozlowski loved her grandma, she just wanted the inheritance). It’s not long before the cops (led by antagonistic Paul Ben-Victor) surround the studio, so without an escape, the foursome run out on live TV! It’s here that Paxton starts to tear down the benevolent public facade Curry has built for himself (including a few skeletons in the closet that even loopy Potts isn’t aware of), as a hostage situation coincides with a tacky religious sideshow for all to see. Meanwhile, Cajun sheriff Leland Crooke is called in to negotiate the situation (the studio audience is still in there), while gun-happy vigilantes and the National Guard also join in on the action from the outside. Beefy Brian Thompson plays a guest on the show, a sportsman who has apparently seen the light. Anthony Geary is a pot-smoking studio controller who sees good in what the would-be robbers are doing.

A good cast goes to waste in this failed 1988 spoof of Evangelical TV shows, mostly because director David Beaird (“Scorchers” with Faye Dunaway and Jennifer Tilly) and writers Joel and Neil Cohen (the former having co-written “Toy Story” and “Cheaper By the Dozen” in the years since) gives us way too many (thin) characters to keep track of. In fact, so many characters are featured here that there isn’t any room for depth, especially with our two chief protagonists (a poorly used Paxton, a miscast and too old Kozlowski) and antagonists (Curry, Potts- both perfectly cast). Well, that is if you think the would-be robbers are meant to be heroes here. That’s another thing the film fails on, we’re given no indication as to why we’re meant to like Paxton and co., whilst Curry and Potts are definitely phoney baloneys themselves (A couple of phony TV Evangelicals? Wow. Haven’t seen that done before..much). It’s almost as if the filmmakers were unsure of how things were meant to play out, once they come up with the basic idea of sending up TV evangelists.

Paxton and Kozlowski are completely dull, which is something I never thought I’d say about Paxton (Kozlowski is another story. She’s believable as Paul Hogan’s love interest- ‘coz she is his love interest, but what else has she done even halfway competently?). With the completely self-indulgent and seemingly never-ending TV show (financed by the money from the innocent, ‘true believer’ folk the Reverend has conned, no doubt), there’s some truly kooky musical numbers that might give it a bit of cult value (indeed the gaudy musical numbers are a little “Rocky Horror” esque, with muscle-bound Thompson looking awfully like the hunky blond dude from that film/musical which of course starred Curry), but otherwise this is a case of too much (muchness) yet too little (depth). The characters of the quirky Cajun sheriff (Crooke) and dopey police officer (Ben-Victor) are especially useless, taking up way too much screen time every time we cut back to them. The gun nuts are also extraneous, adding nothing except needless noisy explosions in the boring finale.

It’s not even funny, aside from Geary as the pot-smoking control room operator, who gets a few fun lines. Even though it’s not remotely original, the subject matter certainly could’ve been ripe for satire or parody (Curry and Potts are certainly game, though I think the latter would’ve been even better if her Tammy Faye-clone character was far more ruthlessly corrupt instead of a spaced-out cult member-like character), but there’s not much of interest to be found here, no wonder it’s barely known (despite that cast). Terrible title (based on part of an American wartime slogan, apparently) probably contributed to it being forgotten too.

Rating: C