Review: Blood Out

Small town sheriff Luke Goss hears that his screw-up brother has been killed by a gang he was trying to leave. When the police investigation appears to be going nowhere (that’s what you get when 50 Cent plays a cop), he decides to take matters into his own hands. He poses as a thug and soon finds himself taken in by local gangster Tamer Hassan, riding with offsider Ed Quinn as they off rival scum. Quinn is also the brother of Goss’ brother’s drug-addicted ex-girlfriend. AnnaLynne McCord plays an S&M freak lieutenant in Hassan’s crew, who may not be all she appears to be. Val Kilmer turns up as another gangster named Arturo (Yes, Arturo), and Bobby Lashley (!) plays a hulking fighter.

 

Although a bit slight-looking, former Bros member Luke Goss is a pretty decent direct-to-DVD action star (if the unlikeliest- a former member of a one-hit wonder Brit boy band? Really?), but this 2011 actioner from debut director Jason Hewitt (producer of the RVD action flick “Wrong Side of Town”) isn’t much chop. It does have a helluva direct-to-DVD action movie cast, though (Goss, Hassan, Vinnie Jones, McCord, 50 Cent, Kilmer, and wrestler/MMA fighter Lashley). Throw in Cuba Gooding Jr., and Batista and you’d have the low-rent answer to “The Expendables”.

 

With two glaring exceptions, the film is actually pretty well-acted for this kind of thing. Goss is in stoic, humourless mode, but that’s kinda appropriate for his kind of no-nonsense, taciturn role. Tamer Hassan is much better here than he was in “Wrong Turn 3”, and is pretty badass. Given less screen time is Vinnie Jones, and that’s a shame, because when on screen, he’s his usual hilarious self. Even 50 Cent isn’t bad, in a mere cameo. He may be a bit of a mumbler, but the guy’s not the worst rapper-turned-actor out there by a long shot. Ed Quinn also impresses in the role of one of Hassan’s men, who chaperones Goss.

 

Less effective is AnnaLynne McCord, who still hasn’t learnt to act since another direct-to-DVD flick with Val Kilmer and 50 Cent, “Gun”. She’s almost Megan Fox bad here, and might just be the new Dina Meyer to boot. And then we come to Val Kilmer, soon to star in the role of the fat Indian from “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”. Look for it off off off off Broadway. Seriously, I don’t want to be mean, but didn’t Kilmer used to be a sex symbol of some kind? Downing a few too many Krispy Kremes and Doritos whilst on the Indian reservation (maybe he ate the Indian from “Cuckoo’s Nest”?) seem to have obliterated not only his looks, but his talent. He’s not only off the charts bad here, he’s just plain off the charts in general. He looks to be sleepwalking, or perhaps on drugs. I don’t want to speculate, but he just seems really ‘off’ here, and not in any way that might benefit the film. It’s his worst screen performance to date, including “Red Planet”, “The Island of Dr. Moreau”, and “Hardwired”. Special mention must also be made of Bobby Lashley in the role of Woody Strode in “Spartacus”. The only thing more WTF about his appearance in this, is that the film suddenly turns into a fight tournament movie towards the end. Jarring to say the least.

 

Sadly, the whole thing is just routine and dull. In fact, Steven Seagal did this kind of thing better a few years back in “Urban Justice”, which is saying something. The action scenes are annoyingly shot in the metallic-blue, wobbly camera style of Joe Carnahan, which is a bit counteractive to one’s enjoyment, although at least the picture quality is much better than “Streets of Blood” (a previous crime flick starring Val Kilmer and 50 Cent- are they business partners or something?).

 

It’s nothing you’ve got to rush out and see, in fact, you’ve seen it a million times before and better. Awful rap/hardcore soundtrack with uber-repetitive song lyrics, too.

 

Rating: C