Review: Criminal

Beginning in London, American CIA agent Ryan Reynolds is attempting to acquire a computer program from Eurotrash hacker Michael Pitt that has the capacity to commandeer US nuclear codes. Reynolds is chased, caught, tortured and killed by all-round bad guy Jordi Molla, who wants the technology for himself to do all-round bad guy things with it. He’s also pissed that Pitt has apparently found a conscience and met with the CIA. Tactless London-based CIA bigwig Gary Oldman enlists the aid of neuroscientist Tommy Lee Jones (!) to use his experimental program of basically taking the memories of one patient (that would be Reynolds) and implanting them in the brain of another. Enter hardened psycho criminal Kevin Costner (admirably taking the material very seriously), a barely consenting guinea pig currently on death row who just so happens to have the right existing brain condition to make for a suitable candidate. After the operation is completed, Costner finds himself a confusing mess (and in severe cranial pain) as the already unhinged convict now has flashes of someone else’s life, including images of Reynolds’ sweet wife (Gal Gadot) and kid. Managing to escape CIA custody, Costner goes on the run, with the intention of tracking down the large stash of money he learns about from the remnants of Reynolds’ brain. Meanwhile, he has both the CIA (who don’t trust him, obviously) and terrorists after him. Alice Eve and Scott Adkins play a couple of Oldman’s underlings.

When I heard about the plot of this 2016 Ariel Vromen (writer-director of the interesting criminal biopic “The Iceman”) flick, I thought for sure it sounded like a Jean-Claude Van Damme movie, either from his mid-90s period (the era of “Timecop”) or his underrated latter day direct-to-DVD stuff (interesting films like “Replicant”, “Wake of Death”, “Until Death” etc.) Basically a fun but dopey action movie plot. Instead it’s a film with Kevin Costner, Gary Oldman, Tommy Lee Jones, and Ryan Reynolds that got a theatrical release (barely) in the States. I obviously have loftier expectations for a film with that cast than say a Van Damme film, and thus I was a little underwhelmed by this admittedly batshit, but uneven film.

The cast is interesting on paper and the goofiness of the plot (a little similar to Van Damme’s much better “Until Death” crossed with the overrated “Face/Off”) takes it some of the way. However, eventually you start to wonder just why the hell such a big-name cast are in this thing when the majority of the characters are poorly written and/or not afforded much screen time. That wouldn’t be an issue if the cast were B-grade, really, especially if you cast an action movie guy in the lead and emphasise that aspect of the film. As good as Kevin Costner is in the role (a mixture of his roles in “Mr. Brooks” and “A Perfect World”), I kinda wished direct-to-DVD action star Scott Adkins played his role. With Adkins (whose presence here is probably due to it being a Millennium Films gig) in the role, you’d have yourself a fine B-grade action movie where you can excuse the flaws much more. Also, as much as Adkins (yet again playing a small role in a ‘big’ film) is no Kevin Costner, he’s capable enough as an actor to not suffer much for the casting of a more action-oriented guy. Thus, I wouldn’t expect as much and be as disappointed as I ended up being with the film as is. Honestly, this is a fun action movie gone begging I think, at the service of an ‘all-star A-list’ cast that frankly didn’t end up moving the needle much anyway.

On the plus side, this one hits the ground running and Ryan Reynolds impresses early on. So much so that it’s a shame that he’s not long for the film. Still, early on the film at least has quite a pulse if nothing else. Also as scripted by the late Douglas Cook (previously having worked on “The Rock” and “Double Jeopardy”) and the still-living David Weisberg (ditto), the film is frigging insane, plot-wise, if quite clunky in the early going. That batshit quality keeps you awake, and it does get better as it goes along for the most part. As for Costner, he sells his character’s confusion and physical pain really well, even if he’s occasionally a tad hammy playing a brutal prisoner. Still, it’s interesting to watch him play something different. Some of his latter day work has been pretty interesting, actually. The unhinged nature of his character here is what truly keeps you interested in the film, uneven as it is overall.

The main issue here is one of character, as the only character worth a damn is the main one. Michael Pitt and Jordi Molla are well-cast but underused, whilst staring at computers next to Gary Oldman is far beneath the talents of Adkins and the lovely Alice Eve. As for Mr. Oldman, his performance is quite overpitched and the character’s callousness is nonsensical. He’s being rude and ruthless when it’s one of his own guys involved in the plot, essentially. I just didn’t buy it, there was something clunky about the set-up and Oldman’s character and performance are the main contributor to that. I also think he and Tommy Lee Jones should’ve switched roles. Both would still be wasted, but I think Oldman would make for a more convincing scientist/doctor and Jones a more convincing lawman. Jones is still fine, but the role isn’t a good fit for him and is a pathetic role anyway.

Basically this is an A-grade character played by an A-grade actor, in a film with a whacky B-movie story that gets better in the second half, but with poorly defined supporting characters. It’s a watchable and sometimes insane mix, but ultimately just under a recommendation. Come up with a smarter script or recast the lead with an action star and beef up the action to counter the script/character issues, and you’d likely have a more enjoyable film (if not a better one). As is, it’s not bad but a little unsatisfying.

Rating: C+