Review: Aces: Iron Eagle III

Aging military man Col. ‘Chappy’ Sinclair (Lou Gossett Jr.) this time leads a band of geriatric WWII flyers who are part of an Air Show-type deal. His comrades include a Brit (Christopher Cazenove), and surprisingly a German (the late Horst Buchholz) and a Japanese dude (Sonny Chiba). Debutante Rachel McLish turns up as the sister of one of Chappy’s old buddies to tell him that he’s been killed in what appears to be some kind of drug operation coming out of their own air base! This little operation is headed by former Nazi nasty Paul Freeman and his Colombian (or is it Peruvian? I’m not sure) cohort Juan Fernandez, as well as some traitors in Chappy’s midst. Chappy decides to round up his aging buddies, and aided by McLish and a streetwise low-level gangbanger (Phill Lewis) they head out to save the day. Fred Dalton Thompson (he be dead, too now) turns up as the good ‘ol boy promoter of the air show, Mitch Ryan is the commanding officer on the American Air Force base, and Tom Bower is a federal agent.

The first two “Iron Eagle” films basically ripped-off “Top Gun”, and now this 1992 film from journeyman director John Glen (who directed the Bond films from “For Your Eyes Only” through to “Licence to Kill”) seems somewhere in the vicinity of Alistair MacLean or something like “The Dirty Dozen”. That’s a step in the right direction if you ask me, but only one step. At the end of the day, this is only slightly better than the previous two.

There’s way too much plot, but that’s preferable to its simplistic predecessors, I must say. Like the previous films, the cockpit scenes are pretty awful, this time though, it’s due to shoddy blue-screen work. It gives the whole film a 1986 vibe that it’s never really able to shake. At least the camera doesn’t shake like buggery as it did in the previous film, but this ain’t “The Blue Max”. Meanwhile, the banter between the heroes is hokey and forced. The casting of the great Sonny Chiba is a real sticking point for me. It seems odd to cast a martial arts guy not known for his English-speaking skills in a role that mostly has him stuck in a plane. And then when you find out the twist about his character (which kinda makes him less heroic), it becomes even more head-scratching. Even with some eventually redemption, it leaves him completely hamstrung. Were Pat Morita, George Takei (who would’ve been perfect), and Mako busy at the time? Why was it necessary to get Chiba? It’s like casting Jackie Chan as a racing car driver in “Thunderbolt”. Pointless and useless. Meanwhile, Chiba’s last scene, whilst inevitable, is just the worst Japanese stereotype imaginable. In fact, I bet you can already work out what it is, without having seen the film. Oh yes, they do go there. The late Christopher Cazenove isn’t much better, stuck playing a fatuous ‘Tally ho!’ aging ‘Errol Flynn meets Terry-Thomas’-type of character that wears on the nerves very quickly. He’s quite embarrassing, to be honest, especially with that godawful ponytail. The best of the veteran flyers is probably Horst Buchholz, who I always felt was dealt an impossible hand in his casting in “The Magnificent Seven” back in 1960. He’s certainly improved a lot as an actor since then, where the German actor was cast as a Mexican in the equivalent of the role played by legendary Toshiro Mifune in “The Seven Samurai”. Gossett’s fine as always, although I’m not sure why he wears a bowtie with his military uniform- does he double as busboy? Stunt casting comes in the form of female bodybuilder Rachel McLish, who actually isn’t as bad as I’d been expecting, and also not as mannish, either (Yes, she looks a bit like Rambo, but still feminine...ish). The best performances actually come from the rest of the cast, including the always solid Mitch Ryan (in a predictable role), Fred Dalton Thompson, Tom Bower, and especially Paul Freeman and the perfectly cast Juan Fernandez as the villain and henchman, respectively. They aren’t in the film as much as they should be, but the film is all the better for their rock-solid efforts. Mind you, I’m not sure what a Nazi is doing in cahoots with a Colombian (I think one of the two ought to have been eliminated, much as I liked them both) but never mind. Thompson, the politician-turned-actor-turned-politician doesn’t get much to do, but he’s one of the few actors out there who can pull off the Boss Hogg wardrobe and not look stupid. He adds a bit of colour to his few scenes at any rate. Less impressive is an actor named Phill Lewis in a stereotypical 80s African-American likeable street hustler role. I kept thinking he was DJ Jazzy Jeff and was looking out for the Fresh Prince (He even name drops DJ Jazzy Jeff at one point). His sudden transformation late in the film into G.I. Bro was hardly convincing. Look out for serial action movie punching bag Branscombe Richmond (who got his arse handed to him in “Action Jackson”, “Hard to Kill”, and others) as a Colombian henchman who ill-advisedly tries to rape McLish. Richmond worked as a stuntman on the film along with veteran actor/stuntman Bob Minor who turns up as a gun-totin’ druggie in one scene. ‘Heart-throb for a second’ Rob Estes is interestingly cast here as one of the token youngsters amongst all the geriatrics, and turns out to be a traitor (No big spoiler, it’s a minor role).

The best thing about the entire film comes from a somewhat surprising source; I now feel sorry for composer Harry Manfredini (who also did good work on the otherwise abominable “DeepStar Six”) having been at the service of all those “Friday the 13^th” films because he gives a really rousing score here, something that you might’ve gotten from Jerry Goldsmith (“The Omen”, “Star Trek: First Contact”), and would never have thought Manfredini was capable of. It’s really good, and enhances the quality of an otherwise seriously mediocre film. It’s a stylish score in a film directed by someone who is anything but a stylist. If you have to watch the film, look out for the scene where a kid gets knocked out by a huge bell. It’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in ages, intentional or not (Fernandez’s subsequent interaction with the bell, less funny). The paint-by-numbers screenplay is once again by Kevin Elders (who co-wrote the first two films), who at least gets credit for changing the formula of the series, if not replacing it with something original. Oh, and I normally don’t mind R&B divas En Vogue, but they should spend an eternity in hell for creating the monstrosity titled “The Boogie-Woogie Hip-Hop Boy of Company B”, that plays during the film. WTF?

Overall the film is clichéd, and typical of director Glen, workmanlike and old-school, but totally unremarkable. Watch it only if you’re a fan of the series or you can’t find the remote.

Rating: C